Posted by Jo at 12:17 27 November 2009
This is a post just for me really, just so I have something to look back on and just so I can talk about how the last year has flown by. Feel free to carry on reading if you want to though.
It only seems like yesterday that I did that pregnancy test and it came up positive and now he's a year old. Time really does go too fast. I'm sat here now thinking about my pregnancy and how excited Gareth and I was when we went for our 20 week scan, hoping to find out the sex of our baby. We found out I was having a boy and I'll always remember Gareth face and how happy he was. He was over the moon, but then came the bad news. I was told "markers" had been found on the scan suggesting Harvey would either have Down Syndrome or Edwards Syndrome. Within seconds our happiness vanished, we were both distraught. Gareth held me while I cried and he cried with me. We were both told in detail what Downs was and what Edwards was and I was given the choice of an Amniocentesis. To find out for sure what was wrong with him. If the doctors would have told me, he might have only had Downs, I wouldn't have had the amniocentesis, I would have carried on my pregnancy as normal and loved my son no matter what, there was no way I'd end my pregnancy because I was having a child with Down Syndrome. But because they told me he could have Edwards Syndrome, I was advises that an Amnio was the best course of action to find out for certain, because if it was Edwards we were told our baby would either die inside me before I reached full term or that he'd be so severly disabled he wouldn't live past a year old. This obviously meant that a termination would be the best possible course of action. There was no way I'd be able to carry on my pregnancy knowing our baby, would end up leaving us and we'd have to bury our son. I chose to have the Amnio.
This period of my life was the hardest time Ive ever been through. From the day I had my Amnio up until the day I got my results all me and Gareth did was hold each other and cry. Our baby had just started kicking and moving and I was faced with the possibility that I might have to end his life. No words can express what them few days were like, while I waited for the results.
The phone rang and I was heaving uncontrollably with nerves. It was time to hear the results. I made the midwife repeat to me 3 times what she said, she told me our baby was fine, he was a perfectly healthy baby, with no problems what so ever. I was over joyed, you cannot imagine how I felt. It was time to enjoy my pregnancy now and wait for the arrival of our ever so special little boy.
I went into labour 3 days early. I'd decided to go shopping alone in Asda and was busy browsing the make up (typical eh) when my waters broke. I just stood there and looked down and thought "oh shit" ha. Luckily an asda employee was walking past so I just grabbed her arm and said "would you mind helping me, my waters have just broke" she looked mortified haha. I reassured her I was ok and not in any pain, but if she could just walk me to my car I'd be fine. By this time my waters were flooding, I was literally walking and water was just pouring out, so bloody embarrassing! I phoned my parents and Gareth and my dad told me there was no way I could drive and to stay put they was coming to get me.
About an hour and half after my waters broke... Harvey was born. I'd had a fast labour with my first child, Anton, so I knew my second would be fast, didn't expect it to be that fast though! He wasn't breathing when he was born, so I didn't get to hold him straight away. He was finally handed to me though and I was stunned at how perfect and gorgeous he was. After all I'd been through and now I was holding my perfect baby boy, it was an emotional moment.
Now that gorgeous baby boy.. is celebrating his 1st Birthday. A birthday at one point that I wasn't even sure that he'd see. This past year has been filled with nothing but happiness. Every single day he's made me laugh and smile, watching him grown and learn something new. Watching his own little personality develop and seeing how he is so much like his Daddy. His has his Daddy's temper for sure haha. Everything about him is Gareth, his looks, his temperament, his personality, he definitely has my intelligence though :P hehe. Your loved more than you'll probably ever know Harvey, by me, by your daddy and most certainly by your big brother.
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